I don't get it

Part of me is embarassed to write this and I can't tell you why.
I am just at such a confussing moment right now. Why is it that all of a sudden I feel like I can't hear God's voice? Why is it that I feel like when I sit and talk to Him I just can't hear what He is saying back to me? I hear of others that have a total conversation with Him and a part of me envies that. I thought that I hear Him all the time but now all of a sudden it it like I am trying so hard to hear Him and He just isn't answering me.
I cried out to Him a few times yesterday and I just didn't hear a response. Maybe I am not ready to hear? Maybe I am choosing not to hear His voice?
Cooper is a very good baby and we are very blessed. I know he is just that, a baby but I am so confussed. Why is it all of a sudden he is not sleeping? Yesterday he didn't sleep until I gave in and cuddled with him. That was the only way I was going to get rid of my headache as well. Now here I am with him WIDE awake and I am so confussed. I don't know what to do. What am I doing wrong? Listen to me whine.
Don't get me wrong, like I said he is a really good baby and I am SO grateful but I am just so confussed at the sudden change. I have asked God why. I have mainly been asking what am I doing wrong? Help me to understand my baby. What can I do to help him? Cooper fights sleep. Has been for a while. It is like going a boxing roung with him. Round 1, first batch of crying because he is falling asleep then he's out. Round 2, here we go again. Round 12 and he is finally done. He is out like a light. I feel like there really is nothing I can do for him while he is fighting it so hard. I just hold him. I hold him close to my heart and talk him through it telling him that he is a good boy and it will be all right.
I ask God for help. Tell me what I need to do but I am not hearing anything. Am I blind to His voice? Am I choosing, unintentionally mind you, not to listen? Am I being punished? I have slacked on my daily devotions and, no offense to those who don't have the time or don't do them so do not take this the wrong way, I sometimes wonder if I am not hearing His voice because I am not reading His word.
I think I need to turn up these hearing aids of mine and just continue to pray. Please let me hear your voice. Please help me to hear you. I do feel you and know you are with me but I long to hear that I am doing alright and that you are walking me through it. I know that you are blessing our lives and helping us through step by step but Father I just want to hear you. I know that it is You that is loving us and pursuing us but why am I not hearing your voice?
This is obviously an early morning rant and I may delete this entry sometime tomorrow but right now I long to hear Him so bad that the tears fall. I long to know that He hears me and is answering me. Even though I know better I need to hear Him tell me. I need to shut up and listen. I am trying...
Thank you Father for all the blessings in my life I know that they come from You. Thank you for the patience You grant me to get through this all step by step. That while I am learning to be a mom I know You are there. Help me Father to open my ears though and listen. I love You Lord. Forgive me.