Not in my timing but His

I always thought that by the time I was 20 I would own my own car. Nope. 26 and just got my first car. Thought by 25 I would have my own home. Nope still renting and paying someone else's mortgage. That is just the way things have turned out. I have some regrets but am happy.
I regret that I never finished college. Actually did one semester at full time failed two out of the four classes and never went back. Now I wish I had some sort of career. Lordco is not a career at all.
It has just been the last week or so that I realized that this is all God's timing. It is what He may want now. Phil and I both have reliable vehicles right now. That has to be God. It worked out too perfectly. I almost feel lost to my own life.
I feel like God is lining things up. Setting them all up one by one. He is the one putting my life on track and helping me to feel more secure. I was afraid of my old car dying. Got a new one and I never even thought to look at that type of car. It is almost like it was just for me.
Lately I have been wanting to run away from some things. But I can't. It isn't possible. I am where I am and going through what I am going through for a reason. He tells me that He is not finished with me in that area. God knows the outcome and why I am where I am. I just need to trust Him and know that it will all work itself out in His timing. Not mine.
I want the pain and the hurt to just be done. I try to ignore it. But it is like God is telling me that I am not working through it like that. I get some rest from things and then it is right back at it. It's like He is telling me, now that you are done pushing it away let me heal you. Let us work through this together. Little by little.
I think that I am done and He tells me that I am not. That there are more steps to follow. So right now I sit here thinking ok bring it on, let's do this and get it done and over with. He tells me that it is not time to push through it right now. "The healing takes time. It has started and it will continue all in My timing."
I really feel like God is setting my life up the way He wants it. It scares me but makes me smile just thinking about it. It overwhelms me sometimes. He really knows what He is doing and it is time that I trust Him. It is moments like this when I take the time to look back I smile. Yeah He knows what is going on. He knows what He has for our future. So it is time to take it day by day. Little by little. Time to work by His clock not mine.