Now What?

My heart is aching.
I have been trying so hard to do things like forgiveness and not hurt anymore. It is hard. Then I see people I love hurting so bad. It literally brings me to my knees. It makes me cry. How can I help? What can I do God? It breaks me inside.
I can feel the pain and the hurt. I can feel the disappointment.
My old wounds that I thought were healed have been ripped wide open. It hurts as it is pulled up into my chest and I am left to feel the bleeding. I am left remembering the hurt. I am left.
I know that we are not going through things alone and that God is there to provide all the healing tools yet here we are bleeding. Resisting. Clinging.
I am on my knees God reaching to you. I am trying to understand what is going on but my feeble little mind just doesn't get it. Help me to understand. Help us to heal. My tears are pouring and my heart aches feeling all the hurt that I witness and that we go through. My chest is tight and my mind is racing.
So here I am Father on my knees, pouring my tears out to you for the hurt. But now what do I do?