Thursday, August 30, 2007

took some pregnancy shots of a friend

This is my friend Lyndsay and her two kids Carter and Bayleigh. She is expecting number three. She was such a great sport for a learner like me. Was very cooperative and didn't care how long we took. I could have done more but I remember how exhausted I was.

Friday, August 24, 2007

So I got a break today

Phil dropped Cooper off at my MIL's. This morning my boys left the house. I followed them to the elevator cause I heard Cooper complaining cause I wasn't there. Gave a final kiss then came back to the house. I cried. I just felt so selfish.

I went back to bed. I slept until 9:40!! Then I even got up and had a nice warm bath. Then I even sat down to a leisurely breakfast. Cleaned the kitchen, loaded the dishwasher and the washer. Then sat down to work on my scrap book. I got THREE pages done. I am very pleased with them too.

Phil called me later in the day and said that Cooper was SO excited to see Grammy. Cause he hasn't seen her in a while.

I left at 4 to go get Cooper. I couldn't get there fast enough. HAHAHAHA. I ran into the house and crouched down with my arms open and he ran....RIGHT PAST ME! LOL. But then it was like he realized, hey my mommy is here! Then came to me and didn't want me to put him down. I missed him so much. Didn't miss the hitting so much though. Hehehe.

Today after dinner at the inlaws we were all outside and Cooper said Mamma. Not like momma. It was definately Grandma just sounded different. I don't know if you get what I mean.

But I feel refreshed. My shoulder had a chance to rest, it has been acting up with having to lift him so much. My mother in law even said we could do this once a month and that I would NOT be taking advantage of her. They had so much fun today. Fun day.

Thursday, August 23, 2007

Getting a break

I am getting a break tomorrow. Tomorrow morning my little boy leaves for the day with his daddy. Daddy goes to work and Cooper goes to Grammy's.

I am seriously having mixed feelings. I am excited to go back to bed. To clean. To scrapbook. But I will be saying good bye to my son for the day. He will be out of my hands and will be in the capable hands of his daddy and his Grammy. I just am not sure. A day without him. I have never had that.

I know he will be fine. He will be leaving with a lunch and a list of the times he does stuff. This is just so odd and there is a huge part of me that feels guilty to need this break. To need to relax. I feel bad. I feel anxious. I feel excited. I feel selfish. I have mixed feelings about this.

Not that I don't love my son. I just want a few hours. No diapers. No crying. But then no hugs. No kisses. No loves. No reading to my boy.

Oh dear am I doing the right thing? Maybe I should just phone and cancel.

Monday, August 20, 2007

I need to get away

just for the weekend. I need to get back to God. I need to refind him and I am not sure I know how.
I need a bit of a break from my 24/7 job. I love it don't get me wrong but I just want a bit of a break. I feel like I am breaking down.
listen to me talk. Not like anyone reads this darn thing anyway. Does anyone? That gets me discouraged too. one reads cooper's either. why bother with the world? That is how I feel

Friday, August 17, 2007

A devotional I received this morning

by Rick Warren

"Your Life Message includes your testimony. Your testimony is the story of how Christ made a difference in your life. Peter tells us that we were chosen by God “to do his work and speak out for him, to tell others of the night-and-day difference he made for you.” (1 Peter 2:9)

This is the essence of witnessing — simply sharing your personal experiences regarding the Lord. In a courtroom, a witness isn’t expected to argue the case, prove the truth, or press for a verdict; that is the job of attorneys. Witnesses simply report what happened to them or what they saw.

Jesus said, “You will be my witnesses” (Acts 1:8) – not “You will be my attorney.” He wants you to share your story with others. Sharing your testimony is an essential part of your mission on earth because it is unique. There is no other story just like yours, so only you can share it. If you don’t share it, it will be lost forever.

You may not be a Bible scholar, but you are the authority on your life, and it’s hard to argue with personal experience. Actually, your personal testimony is more effective than a sermon, because unbelievers see pastors as professional salesmen, but they see you as a “satisfied customer,” so they give you more credibility.

Personal stories also are easier to relate to than principles, and people love to hear them. They capture our attention, and we remember them longer. Unbelievers would probably lose interest if you started quoting theologians, but they have a natural curiosity about experiences they’ve never had. Shared stories build a relational bridge from your heart to theirs – a bridge Jesus can walk across.

Another value of your testimony is that it by-passes intellectual defenses. Many people who won’t accept the authority of the Bible will listen to a humble personal story. That is why on six different occasions Paul used his testimony to share the Gospel instead of quoting Scripture.

The Bible says, “Be ready at all times to answer anyone who asks you to explain the hope you have in you, but do it with gentleness and respect.” (1 Peter 3:15-16) The best way to “be ready” is to write out your testimony and then memorize the main points. "


you know, it really got me thinking. Then feeling that I may never get to share my testimony. There was one point in time where I knew that was all I wanted to do but now I just feel like that opportunity will never arise. I think about it and I know I want to feel comfortable with the people. I would never be able to do it in front of a church. I wouldn't be able to do it on here either. I might have been able to share with a bunch of women though.
I just feel like that opportunity has passed. That I missed that boat. I am not sure it makes sense to anyone else. I am not sure I can fully describe what I am trying to say.
Funny how God has us go through things and it may be that one thing that someone needs to hear you have gotten through. You could be that hope. You can help spread that light. I can't describe how or why I just know it was God. Plain and simple. No grey areas. It was God. It had to have been cause there is just no other explanation.
I find it easier to relate to someone even more once they have shared their story with me. A little light goes off and you think, hey! I know what they mean.
Thank God we aren't all cookie cutter Christians and we have all gone through our own thing. Helps us to relate to others and for others to relate to us.

Thursday, August 16, 2007

I don't like apartments

or places where someone else controls things. I fo but I don't.
It is great when something needs to be fixed and it doesn't come out of my pocket but on days like today it bites.
They shut off the water to the building for the morning. I forgot and went to brush my teeth. It is annoying. And the fire checks where you MUST be home all day cause they will be there between 10 and 3 or something.
Looking somewhat forward to owning my own house one day!

Monday, August 13, 2007

gonna be honest

sometimes I feel like not being joyous but was hoping that when I read the title of my blog every time I post it would spark something inside me.

Today is one of those days where I just want to stay in bed. Still am looking for a sitter for the occasional on call stuff. Sitters just aren't as available as when I was younger. Plus I have to be able to trust them with my kid. There is only a few I can.

We went on a great Kayaking and Canoeing trip with Sue, Dennis, James, Nicole, Phil, Cooper and I. Dennis and Sue paddled Cooper and I on the way up.

My poor car was weighted down.

Cooper ready to go in the boat and with Aunty Sue. He was about to sneeze. LOL

The two hour hike. It rained but was beautiful.

Daddy and Cooper resting.

Then Sue sat with Cooper in the canoe on the way back and I kayaked with James and Nicole. It was LONG. A hour. But well worth it. Still recovering today but am surprised I am not more sore. It was the most perfect way to spend a Sunday and I am glad we get to do things like that.

Friday, August 10, 2007

we have him starting on chores early!

LOL! Guess it is never too early! He will put his laundry in his laundry basket if we ask him to also!!

Monday, August 06, 2007