I am in shock

Today was my weigh in. I went in thinking that I didn't make it as last week I was 195lbs. There was no way I was going to make the 190lb healthy goal weight by the end of the month.

I begrudgingly took my shoes off and stepped up on the scale. Of course I went to the bathroom before doing so as well. Must shed as much weight as possible. I came in at 190.5lbs.

Upon starting the training session my trainer asked me how I was doing and if I have weighed myself recently. I told her yes. She asked me the result. I told her. She was very happy for me. Looking at me she said, "and how do you feel about this?" I looked up at her (we were passing the medicine ball while I was doing situps) and said, I don't think you would really want to know. She told me she did. I told her that the old thought pattern goes through my head. That I failed. That I didn't make it. I failed by half a pound. She looked at me and told me that I needed to try to focus on the fact that I have lost a lot of weight that month and that you can see my toning. I told her she was right. In the back of my mind I tried to push the "failure" out of my mind. I tried to tell myself that I really am doing well.

Once the training session ended we went in for the "Official" weigh in. Are you ready for it.......I came in at 190.0lbs. The real scale that we used told me I reached my goal. I stood there looking at it. She said, "look at what that says, you did it!" then gave me a high five. We talked about my food log, about the goal for next month's weigh in (losing another 5lbs, down to 185lbs) and what body fat percent we wanted to see me at.
Then as we were talking it was sinking in. I kept staring down at that number she wrote. 190.0lbs. 190. 190. 190. it was real. I made the goal. Then it started to sink in and I looked at her with a smile on my face and said, "I really did it." She told me I should be proud of myself. I told her it was a struggle but yes I was proud of myself. I lost the 7lbs in the month. I asked her if that was good and she said it absolutely was.

We are our own worst critics and I find myself being over critical. As I was leaving it was sinking in. I accomplished the monthly goal. I am proud of myself. I did it! Now where is the cheesecake???


went over my measurements taken today. So I was down 7lbs since August 7. I am down a total of 5.5" as well. No going up this time.
Right Biceps: -.5"
Right Thigh: -2"
Chest: -.5"
Belly Button: same
Waist: Same
Hips: -2"
Right calf: -.5"