Tuesday, June 17, 2008

wanting answers.....

to something that I will never get an answer to.

I keep thinking about the pregnancy. Mind you it is a little less. I actually had to THINK how far along I would be. But I can't help but wonder if it might have been a chemical pregnancy.
You know you get the symptoms and everything just there is no baby.
I will never know these answers. Only God knows them.
Am I unhealthy?
Am I overweight?
Did I not take enough vitamins?
Pray too hard? Not hard enough?
Was there really a baby?

I may NEVER know the answers to these questions, even when I get to heaven. But they still go through your head. Time to let go and let God......

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

I'd like to think we'll get the answers some day!!
I hope you are doing okay... I'm sure you'll have your moments but I hope there are blessings coming your way here and there also!!

Nikkaru said...

I hope you can feel peace about it soon. Someone once told me a thought that they had had about miscarriages, and I'm not sure what I really think about it, but they wondered if maybe miscarriages was Gods/nature's way of allowing babies who are sick or have deformaties not to suffer.

You will get to see your baby in heaven

Michelle said...

It was nothing you did, there was nothing you could have done differently that would have changed the outcome. I struggled with that as well. (((hugs)))